Dear Book:

 

It’s been a weirdelicious journey, hasn’t it? I just wanted to thank you for your patience as you let me paint, write and clobber you with my whims. You stood by me through chicken skin as I plucked your feathers and dipped them in ink and soiled you to tell my stories. You are a vessel of honesty and disaster. You embraced all of my catapostrophes, and for that I will always love you cringefully.

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At this point in our ekphrastic journey, you will run through a machine that will clone you over and over. I am sorry to admit that this has all been an experiment and ruse of my insatiable scientstinkering mind. You were born from my wonderment about the very stuff that makes for the nuttiest book in the world. Since I have discovered it in you, I feel compelled to send your bits and bobs all over the world.

 

I am sure that you will be harvested with bottomless adoration, and some may find your charm so compelling that they will roll out the wet carpet for y-ew!

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With love,

Bianca Dove (AKA mum & dad)​

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P.S. I will make sure that anyone who acquires you is aware of your tendency to leap off the page.